Between the devil and the deep blue sea

What would you do if you were given a choice?

A choice between doing what you know is right and doing what you think is right?

in other words, to follow your heart or your head?

what would you do?

would you be prepared to take the risk if you follow your heart?

i can't help thinking whether i'm prepared or not.

i know even if i ask all the people in the world, ultimately the choice has to be made by me.

and i'm so scared of doing what my heart tells me because i don't want to get hurt again.

but then, i can't just walk away and do what i know is right because i want to know what's on the other side of the door.

i want to know if the grass is greener there.

The thought of what if is haunting me.

I know that even after i'm done typing this, i still won't have a clear decision.

the thought of leaving it all up to fate is a little unbearable cos sometimes, you just can't leave things like this all up to fate.

it doesn't go like this.not in that way.

Someone told me "if you want it that badly, go for it. start chasing."

i would if only i didn't fear rejection so much.

i really don't know.

the truth is, i am so tired of loving you.

i wish i could stop but somehow, i just can't.

and i hate myself for it.