Always

Finally I'm actually blogging after such a long span of time, not doing so.

A lot of things has happened. Obviously.

But I'm not going to summarise and write it all down because:

1) I'm too lazy to do so

2) I can't even remember most of what happened

3) I'm just plain lazy.

Now that I'm actually writing here, I can't seem to remember what was it that I wanted to say a few mintues ago.

So it's probably going to be incoherency again from me.

It seems that JC life has sapped all the deep, philosophical, chim thoughts from my brain cells, to replace them with ... wait. There's nothing that acts as a replacer.(is there even such a word?)

So the conclusion is, my brain is significantly empty.

That's really great and comforting to know.

Anyway, I'm supposed to by typing out my lit notes for the Tempest test later on.

But seeing as how I'm totally sick of studying about Caliban and Ariel and what not, I'm just going to read through them later and then probably regret my decision afterwards. -_-

My mum went to the cemetary on mother's day.

I was supposed to follow but I didn't manage to wake up that early and truthfully, I didn't really fancy going.

Not that I don't like it or anything.

It's just that when you try your hardest to forget, after all the years, and the scar is finally nothing more than a mark, it just sucks to have it reopen again when death and the whole finality of it is just staring you in the face.

I know people say time heals all wounds and yeah, to some extent, that's true.

But there are some wounds, like loss, that will never truly heal cos let's just face it, nobody can ever get away from it completely.

I still miss my late grandfather even though 6 years (god it's been that long?) has already gone by.

I just wished that for once, I can tell him all the thousand and one things that I never got to say because I was too young to properly appreciate his presecene.

But then again, life just doesn't work like that.

There's no playback button no matter how grand that sounds.

Speaking of which, I've been having so many dreams lately.

And that's already strange by itself because I never have dreams when I sleep.

But recently, all sorts of dreams have been haunting my sleep and always, always, I'll have someone walk away from me or just disappear or get taken away.

I'm terrified that it's some sort of omen cos I can't deal right now or maybe ever.

And I've been wondering strange things.

Like what would happen if you found out your best keeper and person has cancer?

Then what would you do?

or if you found out that your mum only has 6 months to live?

what would you do?

On a lighter note, I'm diversifying horribly in the whole k-pop thingy.

And while it's great to get to know and love more boys, it's just that I'm on an overload right now.

I haven't even finish downloading and fully appreciating all of DBSK's songs and vidoes and what not, and now there's Big Bang. (blame Sue)

They're nice! :)

And I love their songs although I don't think I can stomach their techno songs just yet.

But now I have a somewhat internal dilemma cos I don't know if I should abandon my DBSK immersion and start on Big Bang. (Sue will of course say the latter.haha)

Hmm.

I really hope Battle doesn't release their album anytime soon cos that means that I'll have an even more complicated dilemma to deal with.

And thank god Super Junior hasn't resumed activities as a whole, complete group yet, and are still laying low for now.

If not, I'll be in a deep mess now. Haha.

Speaking of which, I found this video on youtube when I was searching of DBSK banjun dramas.

It's a video taken in the very same TKG void deck(was that what it was called) that I used to pass by everyday when I was there!

Some girls were dancing to super junior's U. o.0

I had no idea that super junior actually reached all the way to TKGS.

I know that there are plenty in IJC but hmm...

oh well, for the fun of it, here's the video. (they're pretty good but they lack Suju's enthusiasm and smex.duh.)