i can only wish...

Ur gone...I dun noe how 2 feel...I've lost a good fren dat i've spent a gd part of 1 entire month hating...Y? cos u were an asshole..u hurt me so bad..tear me apart bit by bit...rip me up at e seams..so i did wat every1 in my place wld do...hate you..i hated you so much...bt still, u stood by me...u nvr once hated me back...u kept saying ur sori...n i kept turning away cos i didnt noe wat 2 believe...bt i gave u a chance..jus dat one chance...bt i sensed sth wasnt ryt...dat i was doing sth wrong...dat small voice inside my head spoke out 2 me...called out...n i listened 2 it...i broke it off...u persisted...u said u were reali sori...bt i turned away again n again..den u left me alone..jus lyk i asked..n i was glad..bt i still hated u...i jus nvr realised i actuali didnt hate u at all..i loved u...nt in e way i used 2 ...as a fren..a gd fren..bt i realised 2 late..i realised wen ur lying on dat hospital bed, dead to the world...fighting 4 ur life...dat was wen it hit me...i didnt reali hate u did i? if i did, wat e hell was i doing watching u fighting jus 2 stay alive on dat cold hard chair beside ur bed?? i guess i was tinking dat if i hated u, it'll all b easier...all e hurt i had 2 bear dat u inflicted on me...bt truth was, i didnt hate u...n i realised my mistake 2 late...n it cost me...it cost me you...i wish things cld haf been diff...bt dey alrdy happened...it was alrdy fated n wish as hard as i can, i cant change aniting...Im jus so sori...dat i chose 2 hate u instead of confronting my pain...







"Sometimes, we don't always see what's right in front of us..."